Archived Twitter tweets from 2018-07-01 to 2018-07-31, courtesy of the Twime Machine:

• I abandoned Facebook, stopped watching late night talk shows and comedy news shows, and even youtube talk shows and… https://t.co/vPmIYz2ln2 Tue Jul 31 18:54:51 +0000 2018
• Hey Andrej Drapal thanks for the follow! Tue Jul 31 18:32:29 +0000 2018
• one person followed me and one person unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Tue Jul 31 16:30:49 +0000 2018
• RT @DellDracula: Getting ready for work while mentally repeating “The wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” over and ove… Tue Jul 31 10:52:33 +0000 2018
• RT @MWFriedberg: If you don’t understand the relationship between string theory and the Higgs boson, you don’t really understand the Krebs… Tue Jul 31 10:51:12 +0000 2018
• RT @Southldntabby: Academic drag names, thank me later: • Mina Revisions • Moira Komment van Aquestion • Pia Revue • Bette Al • Tanya Trac… Tue Jul 31 10:34:54 +0000 2018
• Expect more of this with the coming influx of self driving cars and trucks https://t.co/MYrumLi043 Tue Jul 31 10:05:23 +0000 2018
• . @brittharr2 let’s adopt one and turn it loose on your neighbours https://t.co/hoQDAmnWFc Tue Jul 31 10:04:12 +0000 2018
• Progress https://t.co/Vt0Av7tmIJ Tue Jul 31 10:02:23 +0000 2018
• RT @dodo: This old feral cat had trouble settling into his new home — until he met these kittens 💞 (via @TinyKittensHQ) https://t.co/GQ2k3n… Tue Jul 31 03:51:31 +0000 2018
• I liked a @YouTube video https://t.co/xmmZ6I6Kv7 Seasonal Youth by Raywat Deonandan (CBC radio, Oct 30 2000) Tue Jul 31 03:34:44 +0000 2018
• Found a recording of me reading one of my short stories on CBC radio 18 years ago! Had to clean up the audio qualit… https://t.co/o7ZtQtMyjg Tue Jul 31 03:31:59 +0000 2018
• Found this old photo of me, apparently back when I was auditioning for the role of hackneyed villain in pretty much… https://t.co/tHywvVcGD5 Tue Jul 31 02:52:23 +0000 2018
• RT @brittharr2: Being a surgeon is so rewarding Pic 1: Patient, side ripped open Pic 2: Family waiting patiently on the couch Pic 3: Reunit… Mon Jul 30 23:59:22 +0000 2018
• The Trivago guy has no top lip. Mon Jul 30 22:43:47 +0000 2018
• RT @bobvulfov: twitter 2010: what is “planking” and why are people doing it twitter 2018: it is wrong to kink shame the nazi for liking bi… Mon Jul 30 21:17:00 +0000 2018
• RT @wesleysnipes: You do not owe an explanation to anyone who doesn’t understand your process for keeping inner peace 🙏🏿 Mon Jul 30 17:46:58 +0000 2018
• RT @oliverbcampbell: Freedom is not given. It is taken. It’s not a question of who’s going to let you, it’s who is ballsy enough to stop yo… Mon Jul 30 17:46:46 +0000 2018
• Zod damn it. Whether it’s while getting a massage or waiting in doctor’s office, there’s always some business douch… https://t.co/9mP0YixQt3 Mon Jul 30 17:42:52 +0000 2018
• I liked a @YouTube video https://t.co/hNdCf5xYO3 Big Star – Daisy Glaze Mon Jul 30 16:30:04 +0000 2018
• @Kutchinbird She may not. But the red head is all over it. Mon Jul 30 10:29:41 +0000 2018
• @Kutchinbird Older and sexier Mon Jul 30 02:06:00 +0000 2018
• @subfornicalorg Oh you noticed? Blush. Mon Jul 30 02:05:45 +0000 2018
• Always curious when I discover that people I have never interacted with have nevertheless already blocked and muted me. Mon Jul 30 00:14:27 +0000 2018
• RT @primalpoly: The history of socialism. 1918: redistribution of wealth. 2018: redistribution of pronouns. Sun Jul 29 16:00:54 +0000 2018
• I’m eating less and exercising more but am still gaining weight. Clearly I have discovered either an exception to a… https://t.co/jLouLiL1UO Sun Jul 29 15:59:55 +0000 2018
• RT @JaredLogan: Mission Impossible Fallout is very good, but at one point they mention that the president knows about the mission. If the p… Sun Jul 29 15:52:26 +0000 2018
• RT @acoyne: A city council is not a cabinet. It is a legislature. Its job is not just to decide, but to represent. https://t.co/oLBszzsTNa Sun Jul 29 15:52:07 +0000 2018
• RT @_scottreid: BREAKING: Doug Ford to cut number of Great Lakes in half. Says new law will double efficiency for fish, watersnakes and car… Sun Jul 29 15:51:55 +0000 2018
• RT @SophieBear__: Overheard at Starbucks Customer: hi my drink order is wrong. This is a frapp I ordered a tea. Batista: *reads cup* are… Sat Jul 28 19:14:52 +0000 2018
• 3 people followed me and 2 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Sat Jul 28 18:46:26 +0000 2018
• RT @rondia: Is there an animal rights candidate running for Mayor of #Toronto? Because I would totally vote for him or her. So far it’s a s… Sat Jul 28 17:44:25 +0000 2018
• Seems like running for mayor of Toronto is the new black. Sat Jul 28 02:26:13 +0000 2018
• I like @Ocasio2018, I really do. But when she ventures into topics beyond activism – like geopolitics and economics… https://t.co/Aks4inQvT1 Sat Jul 28 02:16:07 +0000 2018
• @Leniloo92 I’m having flashbacks! Sat Jul 28 01:55:23 +0000 2018
• Rewatching classic Dr Who. Man, I’d forgotten what excellent, patient and creative science fiction stories they were. Sat Jul 28 01:43:57 +0000 2018
• Well this is upsetting: we have spoiled almost all of the oceans’ wilderness. https://t.co/EGYsNCu1Aw Fri Jul 27 18:07:19 +0000 2018
• RT @pete_schultz: Nothing sounds right about the words “The Secretary of Education’s Yacht” Fri Jul 27 16:30:18 +0000 2018
• RT @ass_deans: Not everyone. Please check in with the dean’s office before speaking on controversial issues, even if you have spent a lifet… Fri Jul 27 14:56:46 +0000 2018
• Still my favourite TV show of all time. I watch an episode every day. https://t.co/sCNxvY0VeT Fri Jul 27 14:56:23 +0000 2018
• RT @ferrisjabr: If you put chalk under a powerful microscope—white cliffs of Dover type chalk, not the modern blackboard variety—you will s… Fri Jul 27 11:59:15 +0000 2018
• Hey ActionBookz thanks for the follow! Fri Jul 27 04:44:22 +0000 2018
• If you kill your own clone, is it murder or suicide? Thu Jul 26 20:38:36 +0000 2018
• RT @aparnapkin: Grant me the serenity to not read the comments, the courage to not read the comments, and the wisdom to not read the commen… Thu Jul 26 16:52:36 +0000 2018
• Every week it seems there’s a trending story about a beautiful model woman who poses nude for some cause or other,… https://t.co/a5cFvgA5Ks Thu Jul 26 16:03:19 +0000 2018
• Hmm. Facebook stock price tanks mere hours after I abandon my account. Coincidence? I think not. Thu Jul 26 16:01:24 +0000 2018
• .@RedParrots https://t.co/NOgnGu8whh Thu Jul 26 11:38:53 +0000 2018
• RT @AmirSariaslan: This is hilarious 😂 https://t.co/LxR2dF84j2 Thu Jul 26 11:38:29 +0000 2018
• RT @walruswhisperer: Just got this heartbreaking image of Zeus the walrus at Marineland. He’s so thin…lethargic. He’s literally dying as… Thu Jul 26 11:36:54 +0000 2018
• Hey Even Cool thanks for the follow! Thu Jul 26 04:57:20 +0000 2018
• RT @MuhammadLila: You know the #TorontoShooting suspect? He was Muslim. You know who else was? The head of the trauma unit that perfor… Thu Jul 26 04:16:53 +0000 2018
• RT @stephenlautens: “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Stephen Harper.” “Stephen Harper who?” “You know, Stephen Harper.” “Sorry dude -… Thu Jul 26 04:08:33 +0000 2018
• RT @RobynUrback: If Lastman wins, Torontonians will be living in a city run by someone’s son, in a province run by someone’s brother, in a… Thu Jul 26 04:08:23 +0000 2018
• 2 people followed me and 3 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Wed Jul 25 17:34:53 +0000 2018
• @RedParrots With 2000 FB friends, it’s a statistical certainty that at least one person finds any of my posts offen… https://t.co/rp1IelewnL Wed Jul 25 15:20:48 +0000 2018
• The threshold for what is considered offensive continues to fall faster than I can adapt. Therefore I’m trying to… https://t.co/O6erz7E7I4 Wed Jul 25 14:41:00 +0000 2018
• Enjoying episode 1 of “Tea for Two” by @IonaItalia and @HPluckrose https://t.co/4XaXSz0xvk Wed Jul 25 13:01:15 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/tIdobEz3Me Wed Jul 25 12:16:51 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/FV9cXjXko0 Tue Jul 24 23:51:47 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/rndYMjvDLs Tue Jul 24 23:43:27 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/qpVZvrbzxO Tue Jul 24 23:27:18 +0000 2018
• I sent my thoughts and prayers, but they came back with postage due. Tue Jul 24 23:19:09 +0000 2018
• Going through security at Toronto island airport. The woman at the bag scanner takes my boarding pass, gives it to… https://t.co/egq5LsQbFr Tue Jul 24 23:15:38 +0000 2018
• At the new Toronto island airport. The couches have AC outlets. There are small work cubicles, too, but they don’t… https://t.co/1CWjNnk8wC Tue Jul 24 23:12:37 +0000 2018
• Dear @GOtransit I just had to vacate the quiet zone on one of your trains BECAUSE IT WAS TOO NOISY. When did the qu… https://t.co/D3WezbAdfE Tue Jul 24 21:00:24 +0000 2018
• RT @TheTweetOfGod: Attention: Will the owners of a blue planet with plate tectonics please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating. Tue Jul 24 20:46:54 +0000 2018
• This is me. There is still honour among pervs. https://t.co/TH8KNth4NT Tue Jul 24 16:01:40 +0000 2018
• I, too, have thought about this. https://t.co/swNvljathS Tue Jul 24 14:33:52 +0000 2018
• Hey Bryan Falchuk, Author, Speaker, Life Coach thanks for the follow! Mon Jul 23 23:27:09 +0000 2018
• .@DavidBilbert https://t.co/wNkJgCTnnq Mon Jul 23 20:12:20 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/E544oLfnRS Mon Jul 23 20:10:42 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/gZlENFjmUd Mon Jul 23 20:09:54 +0000 2018
• While I’m busy complaining about how annoying vaping is, a Pittsburgh woman donates kidney to total stranger after… https://t.co/00SGfKlif5 Mon Jul 23 19:25:20 +0000 2018
• People who vape are so fucking annoying. Volume of smoke (to whatever it is) is much greater than a cigarette and impossible to avoid. Mon Jul 23 16:36:40 +0000 2018
• Who is qualified to explain male life to women more than trans men? Really interesting reading https://t.co/uznlmJlDTt Mon Jul 23 15:32:18 +0000 2018
• RT @davidakin: A perfectly appropriate expense. One which future prime ministers — say, one with five kids whose initials are A.S. — might… Mon Jul 23 13:41:29 +0000 2018
• RT @BraneRunner: @smsaideman too many professors spoil the broth Mon Jul 23 13:31:26 +0000 2018
• TTC didn’t stop at Chester station this morning. Guess the area is still cordoned off for police investigation. Mon Jul 23 13:04:29 +0000 2018
• RT @SteveStuWill: Humans: Males commit 95% of homicides and are 79% of homicide victims https://t.co/Ob5jGp4kTC Chimps: Males commit 92% o… Mon Jul 23 12:22:54 +0000 2018
• Hey Alex Munster thanks for the follow! Mon Jul 23 10:08:19 +0000 2018
• Hey Renata Pereira thanks for the follow! Mon Jul 23 08:08:20 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/MOegv17fzp Mon Jul 23 03:44:50 +0000 2018
• Math. https://t.co/KZdSzlNAtt Mon Jul 23 02:57:42 +0000 2018
• @BraneRunner This one clearly prefers the taste of ass Mon Jul 23 02:35:20 +0000 2018
• Here is a pic of a lizard being swallowed by a snake. But the lizard says, “Fuck you!” and bites the snake’s ass. L… https://t.co/QpfbKj39uC Mon Jul 23 02:23:53 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/qzKaTH8XjN Mon Jul 23 02:20:41 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/qTsg5UJKgZ Mon Jul 23 02:20:24 +0000 2018
• 2 people followed me and one person unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Sun Jul 22 16:19:09 +0000 2018
• I have fond memories of all of these…. except for 10, 15, 16 and 17 https://t.co/wlhrJGuO3g Sun Jul 22 02:01:12 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/SdpJ7b8zM3 Sun Jul 22 01:41:59 +0000 2018
• Donald Dump https://t.co/KOggqWAQio Sun Jul 22 01:40:07 +0000 2018
• Hey LisaDSBildy thanks for the follow! Sat Jul 21 13:08:22 +0000 2018
• Hey Ophelia Syndrome thanks for the follow! Sat Jul 21 04:08:12 +0000 2018
• RT @ChaseMit: Hey Disney, you know who said worse things than James Gunn? Walt Disney. Fri Jul 20 21:54:33 +0000 2018
• And she uses the notoriety to promote a local animal shelter. Oh, I do like this Emelia Holden https://t.co/2tYeltSWNP Fri Jul 20 15:37:57 +0000 2018
• RT @_youhadonejob1: A couple of times. https://t.co/cO1XUxfSll Fri Jul 20 15:32:30 +0000 2018
• Loyalty… not even once. https://t.co/ccuSg6SAZ7 Fri Jul 20 15:16:39 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/lXKipfvsSp Fri Jul 20 15:15:42 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/a3oz77WpIm Fri Jul 20 15:12:44 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/lyXGtRD1CV Fri Jul 20 15:10:24 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/onSXADed4q Fri Jul 20 14:57:07 +0000 2018
• On the anniversary of the Moon landing, I’m re-posting an article I wrote 9 years ago about the event https://t.co/gluet4Hv7R Fri Jul 20 14:29:09 +0000 2018
• .@brittharr2 and I watched “Maigret” with subtitles that were Bosnian or Croatian. One word kept popping up in the… https://t.co/p66c9xSl7u Fri Jul 20 14:22:51 +0000 2018
• RT @primalpoly: The Left needs to understand that wealth is created, not plundered. The Right needs to understand that sexual freedom is n… Fri Jul 20 10:04:11 +0000 2018
• @bumblebrie Quebec ethno nationalism has long history of promoting fertility through a variety of financial, legal and social incentives. Fri Jul 20 10:02:43 +0000 2018
• Today, Edmund Hillary would have been 99 had he lived, and the Moon landing would have been 49 had it happened. #shutupitsajoke Fri Jul 20 09:55:54 +0000 2018
• RT @CMNelsonPhoto: A fence can’t stop my two-year-old from playing with his new best friend. https://t.co/9QBuaq4Ee2 Fri Jul 20 00:29:36 +0000 2018
• Uhoh. Does MUN medical school have long to live? https://t.co/rCnGHh9pTe Thu Jul 19 20:34:56 +0000 2018
• 2 people followed me and 2 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Thu Jul 19 16:28:35 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/eJAeB98JYr Thu Jul 19 15:06:32 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/NxLg82LseJ Thu Jul 19 15:03:43 +0000 2018
• Pricetag placement is key. https://t.co/550LTSqRfC Thu Jul 19 15:03:21 +0000 2018
• . @brittharr2 https://t.co/69uj9JLgEj Thu Jul 19 12:45:50 +0000 2018
• “(Gold) gets dug out of the ground in Africa, or someplace. Then we melt it down, dig another hole, bury it again,… https://t.co/aXbCZ4WMGJ Thu Jul 19 12:23:19 +0000 2018
• “The mob can never be appeased, even when all its demands have been met.” Thu Jul 19 10:24:10 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/9rQ5VWzJrh Thu Jul 19 04:12:58 +0000 2018
• Animated GIF of the day https://t.co/p0Atfj5SNm Thu Jul 19 04:10:57 +0000 2018
• Face of an ant under an electron microscope. Looks like a hipster barista who plays bass in a garage band. https://t.co/5mWn9nGTrk Thu Jul 19 04:09:50 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/RthINqLsGD Thu Jul 19 04:00:45 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/Vna81Q71bJ Thu Jul 19 03:59:54 +0000 2018
• From reddit, of course. https://t.co/L6Aab5uVJq Thu Jul 19 03:37:15 +0000 2018
• Hey Team Sherzai thanks for the follow! Wed Jul 18 19:29:35 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/T6alzbDEx6 Wed Jul 18 13:56:07 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/bArcWVY09h Wed Jul 18 13:51:32 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/sGRIeSS6mT Wed Jul 18 13:51:15 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/PC2I9NrnTz Wed Jul 18 10:09:01 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/apkY5v9Xvt Wed Jul 18 02:57:04 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/EMCIPyq6uo Wed Jul 18 02:54:53 +0000 2018
• Reason #1 for why I don’t miss living in a big city. The asshole density is of neutron star proportions. https://t.co/SyrbfQSt8m Wed Jul 18 00:54:20 +0000 2018
• (Stolen from a dude on Reddit) World: “So now you’re saying Russia did interfere in the elections?” Trump: “Yesn’t.” Wed Jul 18 00:48:30 +0000 2018
• @probheardright 😮 Tue Jul 17 20:35:40 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/lSNvyCdedA Tue Jul 17 20:34:00 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/9rPVy3Fgd2 Tue Jul 17 20:30:52 +0000 2018
• Son to mother: “Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin.” Mother: “Well,… https://t.co/d0hB5KCeve Tue Jul 17 19:30:18 +0000 2018
• RT @sapinker: Are depression & anxiety soaring? (no) Do antidepressants work? (yes) Which sex is more vulnerable to anxiety & depression? (… Tue Jul 17 13:20:28 +0000 2018
• @nbarrowman Self driving cars do. It’s right there in the name. Tue Jul 17 03:54:37 +0000 2018
• RT @SirPatStew: Since I was a child, I’ve fantasized about keeping bees, and I finally am. BeeStew! 🐝 https://t.co/b4VuYMSi3O Tue Jul 17 01:35:12 +0000 2018
• .@nbarrowman https://t.co/6Qd5SAQm5a Mon Jul 16 16:31:32 +0000 2018
• one person followed me and 2 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Mon Jul 16 16:13:54 +0000 2018
• As we enter an era of artistic mediocrity… https://t.co/QuexAB4Q8b Mon Jul 16 14:57:43 +0000 2018
• Geez. I hope they changed the sheets. “The world’s oldest hotel has been a family business for 52 generations 😳” https://t.co/szg7fH5wtM Mon Jul 16 14:18:01 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/IW3s8pXyAn Mon Jul 16 11:48:44 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/Ea5512fCAU Mon Jul 16 04:29:54 +0000 2018
• Kill it! It’s a witch! https://t.co/MnRMVWf9ES Sun Jul 15 23:06:28 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/wKC3tfuo4g Sun Jul 15 18:34:34 +0000 2018
• Apparently these are called mochi cakes. I don’t know what they are or what’s in them. But I do know that I want th… https://t.co/GXEOyNeRhs Sat Jul 14 22:27:41 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/izIkjFpusm Sat Jul 14 22:26:59 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/MeJq2C1N5f Sat Jul 14 22:23:40 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/bxCTdAWnOy Sat Jul 14 13:53:30 +0000 2018
• Hey Andrew Malcolm thanks for the follow! Sat Jul 14 13:29:08 +0000 2018
• Still a better love story than Twilight https://t.co/9e62wRG93H Sat Jul 14 13:23:16 +0000 2018
• Lovely photo of a Turkish girl carrying a goat on her back that just gave birth and her dog carrying the baby. What… https://t.co/Tu3cX0EHPO Sat Jul 14 13:21:12 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/WAFOkKG4Jg Sat Jul 14 13:05:04 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/QlgG7seCSS Sat Jul 14 13:04:33 +0000 2018
• @Leniloo92 Who wants blood pressure? I want an open circulatory system like an insect Sat Jul 14 02:47:42 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/kfYPBoZrV2 Fri Jul 13 18:42:47 +0000 2018
• RT @Chris17050: @bertkreischer https://t.co/Sx28v4tuuF Fri Jul 13 18:41:16 +0000 2018
• Watching Luke Cage season 2. What INSANELY good looking people. Fri Jul 13 18:10:37 +0000 2018
• @nbarrowman If you see the graph, you cannot laugh Fri Jul 13 18:00:21 +0000 2018
• One month of veganism has dropped my resting HR dramatically https://t.co/BDcYIWmyCI Fri Jul 13 17:25:53 +0000 2018
• 2 people followed me and 2 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Fri Jul 13 17:11:42 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/n2ai9a1qpP Fri Jul 13 17:04:52 +0000 2018
• shuddup, it’s a joke https://t.co/qR2718uNpP Fri Jul 13 17:04:04 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/6xfbaQXPYr Fri Jul 13 17:03:13 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/exXcgfzsFx Fri Jul 13 16:36:22 +0000 2018
• Interesting ad placment https://t.co/D9r09bRZn6 Fri Jul 13 15:47:10 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/kAzG039JGy Fri Jul 13 14:23:09 +0000 2018
• Happy 78th birthday to @SirPatStew https://t.co/urWiv3y9fd Fri Jul 13 14:22:59 +0000 2018
• @DavidBilbert He just tweeted the same thing Fri Jul 13 00:32:18 +0000 2018
• Ha! People actually think this is real. https://t.co/p3zKqI9SpR Thu Jul 12 21:34:12 +0000 2018
• “If You’re Criticizing Elon Musk for Trying to Save Kids With a Mini-Submarine, It’s Time to Take a Long, Hard Look… https://t.co/5ccVhe328A Thu Jul 12 21:24:49 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/Sj7YCDs3Qs Thu Jul 12 20:26:54 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/MzI87kkNny Thu Jul 12 20:23:26 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/tt9G8cYZp5 Thu Jul 12 18:48:35 +0000 2018
• Getting really fed up with armchair heroes who only know how to take down those trying to do good in the world. “We… https://t.co/ZEZuyWR2Tg Thu Jul 12 18:45:58 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/R1O99JvhpN Thu Jul 12 16:23:00 +0000 2018
• It’s mildly embarrassing how much I enjoy traveling on the GO train. Thu Jul 12 12:35:28 +0000 2018
• Hey Michael Orsini thanks for the follow! Thu Jul 12 11:44:35 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/k5Ws1TOGhC Wed Jul 11 13:48:13 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/ytfLHk0N0L Wed Jul 11 13:47:51 +0000 2018
• “Dear America, appreciate your allies. After all, you don’t have that many.” Sad part is that this time Trump might… https://t.co/S3UqxCguxI Wed Jul 11 13:34:34 +0000 2018
• israeli team is too late to win the Google Lunar X Prize, but still might make it to the Moon https://t.co/i6KvJacrdD Wed Jul 11 13:32:49 +0000 2018
• Hey Sanni Yaya thanks for the follow! Wed Jul 11 12:09:22 +0000 2018
• Video of former UFC welterweight champion @MattSerraUFC subduing a violent crazy man in a restaurant https://t.co/s17GPs2sf9 Wed Jul 11 02:37:38 +0000 2018
• “When you humanize your enemy, you, in turn, may be dehumanized by your community.” Wed Jul 11 01:33:39 +0000 2018
• When I want to pretend to be smart, I play Mouret’s “Rondeau” in the background https://t.co/zZDWmEUKiY Wed Jul 11 01:30:21 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/0FKcM8Aqkg Wed Jul 11 00:48:36 +0000 2018
• “A common man marvels at uncommon things. A wise man marvels at the commonplace.” -Confucius Wed Jul 11 00:28:44 +0000 2018
• Watching a youtube discussion of Google business practices, which the discussants frequently saying the word, “Goog… https://t.co/3AkoLcDmtb Tue Jul 10 22:50:05 +0000 2018
• Was disappointed that Sri Sri Ravi Shankar doesn’t play sitar. D’ohh! Tue Jul 10 21:54:46 +0000 2018
• I tell people this and they don’t believe me: the world record for fasting is THREE HUNDRED EIGHTY TWO DAYS with ze… https://t.co/F6W9TCwLPb Tue Jul 10 21:41:16 +0000 2018
• Memories. https://t.co/QCFICvHXle Tue Jul 10 20:14:05 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/WlPZKrhahs Tue Jul 10 20:11:25 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/1eTEICGv1G Tue Jul 10 20:10:53 +0000 2018
• I am in agreeance with those who agree that the word agreeance is not a synonym for agreement, but is rather the act of agreement. Tue Jul 10 20:06:57 +0000 2018
• Colour me surprised. Not. https://t.co/REuN4TqKVE Tue Jul 10 18:51:32 +0000 2018
• @RedParrots i.e. most university professors Tue Jul 10 18:47:35 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/mYRwkqCx6C Tue Jul 10 18:40:40 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/1p1rPvubL3 Tue Jul 10 18:38:10 +0000 2018
• Since I want everyone to have sexual satisfaction, even plants, I have placed my flowering hibiscus outside. Hopefu… https://t.co/0v6eolqEFA Tue Jul 10 18:27:11 +0000 2018
• one person followed me and 3 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Tue Jul 10 16:10:47 +0000 2018
• @rondia @elonmusk He did a hell of a lot more than send his “thoughts and prayers” Tue Jul 10 14:23:13 +0000 2018
• This is not hate. I celebrate what @elonmusk tried to do in Thailand. But this is still funny as fuck: https://t.co/8PqNKk3x1h Tue Jul 10 14:21:58 +0000 2018
• I don’t get the hate that @elonmusk receives from the virtuous set. The man has a colossal ego, but so what? He’s s… https://t.co/MVzbWcxkRY Tue Jul 10 14:15:38 +0000 2018
• The world is made up of two kinds of people: those who do things and those who criticize those who do things. Both… https://t.co/zXgODj5R2t Tue Jul 10 13:54:46 +0000 2018
• RT @tedgracey: Ekapol Chanthawong lost his whole family as a kid. He trained as a monk & then devoted his life to helping coach kids. He ke… Tue Jul 10 04:01:03 +0000 2018
• @PainDetective hey it’s natural! Tue Jul 10 00:14:25 +0000 2018
• If I lived in Pompeii when the volcano was erupting, this would be my final moment, too. https://t.co/0VckUyJyTT Mon Jul 09 13:59:47 +0000 2018
• My grade 7 music teacher told us that ELP wrote “Fanfare for the Common Man.” Lies! All lies! Aaron Copland wrote… https://t.co/MtTQbSBwMX Mon Jul 09 06:32:08 +0000 2018
• Unbelievable video form the surface of a comet https://t.co/y4GKf1jYqV Sun Jul 08 23:59:56 +0000 2018
• I liked a @YouTube video https://t.co/1GB4nkX4Hv Thailand cave rescue: Meet the volunteer helpers – BBC News Sun Jul 08 20:03:37 +0000 2018
• .@HeatherEHeying is such an interesting and insightful woman https://t.co/7TrW31d6nv Sun Jul 08 18:37:14 +0000 2018
• RT @DaveRhodes1898: Only rooting for one soccer team today⚽ #ThaiCaveRescue #YouGotThis #TheWorldIsWatching https://t.co/6DoskPtRq8 Sun Jul 08 17:07:37 +0000 2018
• Cripes. I’m having a panic attack just thinking about this. #thaicaverescue https://t.co/WzXBnOtZop Sun Jul 08 17:04:41 +0000 2018
• Fingers crossed that everyone gets out safely and that they all get a piece of the movie rights #thaicaverescue https://t.co/aZ2THG0sau Sun Jul 08 16:45:06 +0000 2018
• Man, I’m getting really emotional thinking about today’s rescue. What a moment. #ThaiCaveRescue https://t.co/SoRxbDmwYe Sun Jul 08 16:20:35 +0000 2018
• RT @GrupoCapitolSpa: I hope everyone takes a moment today to remember Saman Gunan, the Thai Navy Seal that died making sure the kids stuck… Sun Jul 08 16:16:08 +0000 2018
• @persephone247 I like watching Brock lose at things Sun Jul 08 04:52:10 +0000 2018
• @persephone247 Still. I will watch the shit out of that fight. Sun Jul 08 04:46:23 +0000 2018
• Increasingly I’m suspecting that wrestling might be the single best martial art #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 04:41:44 +0000 2018
• Did Joe just drop an F bomb in his role as commentator? Might be first time #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 04:39:10 +0000 2018
• That’s some weak WWE shit #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 04:34:27 +0000 2018
• RT @GOOCHAVELI: Daniel Cormier once again reppin’ for the fat boys!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 04:28:00 +0000 2018
• Jon Jones must be going INSANE now #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 04:27:31 +0000 2018
• Well Stipe definitely has the scarier walk-in #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 04:15:32 +0000 2018
• I accept that DC might be the greatest martial artist of all time. But looking at his physique, my brain just can’t… https://t.co/dGQIqc5N82 Sun Jul 08 04:12:47 +0000 2018
• WTF? Is Brock gonna do a run-in? #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 04:05:24 +0000 2018
• Elon Musk will save us all https://t.co/0nfaqtT4Rj Sun Jul 08 04:04:47 +0000 2018
• I love Perry as a fighter, but I miss him as the lead singer of Journey #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 03:28:57 +0000 2018
• RT @mma_gifs_: What a fight!! And now we have LEWIS VS NGANNOU UP NEXT!!! #UFC226 https://t.co/3ir3VS347q Sun Jul 08 03:27:21 +0000 2018
• That Perry left hook weirdly became a hammer fist #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 03:25:36 +0000 2018
• Paul Felder looks like Lucifer from Supernatural https://t.co/FfMzmF7CvG #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 03:17:22 +0000 2018
• Perry looks like he’s wearing a yarmulke #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 03:12:08 +0000 2018
• RT @HogT1de: FYI…All you WOOO assholes at live sporting events are why we can’t have nice things. I remember my first night out drinking… Sun Jul 08 03:11:12 +0000 2018
• @brittharr2 i thought that would get your attention Sun Jul 08 03:04:14 +0000 2018
• Hey シンデ ィ thanks for the follow! Sun Jul 08 03:03:11 +0000 2018
• Gokhan Saki has been knocked out by killers several times in his career. Maybe his chin isn’t what it used to be, a… https://t.co/w3vSTchScH Sun Jul 08 03:00:45 +0000 2018
• I just want to see Mike Perry’s dance entrance. It makes me feel funny in my swimsuit region. #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 02:55:46 +0000 2018
• Matt Hughes always rocking that special education haircut #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 02:52:54 +0000 2018
• wow. haven’t seen a triangle-switch-to-armbar victory in UFC in a long while #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 02:50:23 +0000 2018
• RT @persephone247: I watch movies like this and find myself wishing I could have lived during this time and had this type of romance and th… Sun Jul 08 02:39:58 +0000 2018
• RT @persephone247: Daniel Cormier still has all his baby fat…and most of his adult fat. #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 02:39:25 +0000 2018
• @persephone247 which 40%? The spelling? Sun Jul 08 02:38:44 +0000 2018
• Okay, Stipe deserves the victory; he’s done everything right. But if DC wins, the drama is set for another Jones fi… https://t.co/1zvdA8IECe Sun Jul 08 02:36:09 +0000 2018
• Crap. I wonder what supplements he’s on #UFC226 https://t.co/cpMbit1grh Sun Jul 08 02:31:04 +0000 2018
• HOLY SHIT #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 02:24:32 +0000 2018
• Damn it. My illegally pirated stream of #ufc226 just froze Sun Jul 08 02:21:12 +0000 2018
• retweeted mostly for the Rick and Morty reference https://t.co/uyLDuIAWp8 Sun Jul 08 02:17:48 +0000 2018
• Whenever I hear “Gokhan Saki” I immediately assume he’s a new character on Dragonball Z #UFC226 Sun Jul 08 02:13:40 +0000 2018
• I would like to see @UriahHallMMA become the assassin we all want him to be tonight #ufc226 Sun Jul 08 01:40:33 +0000 2018
• RIP comic book legend Steve Ditko Sun Jul 08 01:38:18 +0000 2018
• I saw that “Russia” was trending and wasn’t sure if it was a sports thing, or if I needed to get my sweet ass to the fallout shelter. Sun Jul 08 00:45:45 +0000 2018
• @CKuziemsky you mean the guy I hired to ghostwrite it? Sun Jul 08 00:10:14 +0000 2018
• @RedParrots For that price, I will inscribe it into your toenails Sat Jul 07 23:23:29 +0000 2018
• According to Amazon, a new copy of my 2nd book goes for $8.99. But a used copy goes for the great limited deal of $… https://t.co/1hSqJ1ICrW Sat Jul 07 23:16:34 +0000 2018
• A friend just dug this up…. a signed copy of the manuscript from my 2nd book, way back in 2003. https://t.co/qD679rRLx5 Sat Jul 07 23:10:30 +0000 2018
• Just saw Ant-Man 2. Lame story with eye-rolling technobabble…. but nothing blew up and no one was killed, yet her… https://t.co/fnJYoVh72U Sat Jul 07 23:07:23 +0000 2018
• Just saw Ant-Man 2. Damn, Michelle Pfeiffer looks good at 60! Sat Jul 07 23:00:31 +0000 2018
• @good_egg @brittharr2 My blood type is also my motto: B positive. #shutupitsfunny Sat Jul 07 19:01:34 +0000 2018
• I knew a soft spoken young man who rescued a woman who had fallen onto the train tracks. He then got onto the next… https://t.co/ynecHkGjl8 Sat Jul 07 18:58:37 +0000 2018
• RT @brittharr2: My O negative blood guilt is getting to me. Hydrating up and donating today! https://t.co/9Iq7VPFtGC Sat Jul 07 18:33:21 +0000 2018
• 3 people followed me and one person unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Sat Jul 07 15:30:34 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/qEuGGt1P6A Fri Jul 06 21:28:24 +0000 2018
• One of my many house plants regularly drops a snaking vine and I usually trim it back. I think this time I will let… https://t.co/aiIcSPdKgD Fri Jul 06 20:59:38 +0000 2018
• RT @sapinker: What’s gotten into the NY Times? “Happy Birthday Karl Marx – You were right”? Repeated articles against free speech? In Quill… Fri Jul 06 20:19:52 +0000 2018
• I don’t understand why there are different brands of ketchup. They all taste the same to me. Fri Jul 06 20:00:27 +0000 2018
• RT @IonaItalia: Well, just spotted a Christian conservative excoriating Darwinism because it contradicts the Bible & an ultra woke leftist… Fri Jul 06 19:30:32 +0000 2018
• @BraneRunner But won’t it go blind? 😉 Fri Jul 06 19:27:20 +0000 2018
• Every day my indoor hibiscus flowers anew, and every night its blossoms fall to the floor, its pollen uncollected.… https://t.co/WT0vTZV3mn Fri Jul 06 18:47:12 +0000 2018
• Hey Terry Newman thanks for the follow! Fri Jul 06 13:48:21 +0000 2018
• “Maybe there’s an opening for not a trade negotiator, but a trade therapist.” -some Bloomberg analyst Fri Jul 06 13:42:15 +0000 2018
• “one does not sway hearts and souls through the policing of language, the policing of thoughts, the silencing of vo… https://t.co/bdM8INGmZZ Fri Jul 06 13:36:06 +0000 2018
• Hey What’s Trending thanks for the follow! Fri Jul 06 06:58:05 +0000 2018
• RT @rolandparis: I’m so tired of Donald Trump insisting that other advanced industrial economies, including Canada, charge substantially hi… Thu Jul 05 20:00:43 +0000 2018
• @JustHerod how about saturday or sunday brunch? Thu Jul 05 19:43:03 +0000 2018
• @JustHerod why yes I am. *blush* This had better not be that OTHER Adrian! Thu Jul 05 18:36:34 +0000 2018
• Well meaning amateur posts article expressing interesting pop science theory. Specialist with very narrow but deep… https://t.co/q3fNxxOT2e Thu Jul 05 16:17:13 +0000 2018
• Recent grad looking for an opportunity with responsibility and impact? Yellowknife is recruiting a Risk and Perform… https://t.co/wujuaZwMsw Thu Jul 05 15:46:17 +0000 2018
• Any of my professor friends out there also experiencing a higher than usual number of requests to review journal ma… https://t.co/ykoy2tF46x Thu Jul 05 14:43:59 +0000 2018
• #fail https://t.co/h933CWLA5I Thu Jul 05 13:29:05 +0000 2018
• Pardon the racism https://t.co/9CE3o4JhPo Thu Jul 05 13:28:25 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/C7tSjA9XC5 Thu Jul 05 13:26:05 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/MpBJjwAaw2 Thu Jul 05 13:22:54 +0000 2018
• Trolling a mosquito https://t.co/pBI8aVKzSj Thu Jul 05 13:21:18 +0000 2018
• Hey Layal Alessandra thanks for the follow! Wed Jul 04 23:22:33 +0000 2018
• Once you’ve had a Chinatown foot massage, an hour later you want another. https://t.co/MovTqq087e Wed Jul 04 22:00:22 +0000 2018
• one person followed me and 3 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Wed Jul 04 15:39:19 +0000 2018
• Overwhelmingly, more people die globally of cardiovascular disease than by war, crime, suicide, natural disasters, and terrorism combined. Tue Jul 03 20:42:44 +0000 2018
• Really? I have to deal with this nonsense now? https://t.co/W8Z4ETSLyr Tue Jul 03 19:42:15 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/XSJwqt8K6M Tue Jul 03 17:59:48 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/l7xuNvlPQU Tue Jul 03 17:42:14 +0000 2018
• As a former federal “Chief Scientist”, this makes me feel weird https://t.co/2eO87E82nt Tue Jul 03 17:27:56 +0000 2018
• I saw that “Paul McCartney” was trending and immediately feared the worst. Seems the news is that he’s touring agai… https://t.co/pWsRKxZmfS Tue Jul 03 17:01:45 +0000 2018
• I’m trying to eat less sugar. Then I see something like this, and my pancreas becomes pure insulin. https://t.co/qJNq8VC1iX Tue Jul 03 15:41:02 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/4QNSAK0r1J Tue Jul 03 15:39:50 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/mpFxoUGzbC Tue Jul 03 15:33:51 +0000 2018
• https://t.co/exqVHecxU2 Tue Jul 03 15:33:12 +0000 2018
• I didn’t think it was possible for me to care less about professional team sports. Yet here we are. Tue Jul 03 12:13:15 +0000 2018
• Three alarms – – my Google Home, my phone, and my actual alarm clock – – were set to wake me at 5am. Yet I woke at 7am. Technology fail. Tue Jul 03 11:56:22 +0000 2018
• Hey Damage Control thanks for the follow! Tue Jul 03 04:32:04 +0000 2018
• Gawd, I’d forgotten what a horrid movie Armageddon is. Tue Jul 03 03:15:13 +0000 2018
• RT @primalpoly: The humanities, before and after postmodern epistemology. https://t.co/VV73iVw4y8 Mon Jul 02 23:48:55 +0000 2018
• “This dog was bitten by a rattlesnake while saving his human” https://t.co/NFgYZ0flMA Mon Jul 02 16:27:00 +0000 2018
• Only the latest reason that I don’t take Vice (or for that matter Vox) seriously: https://t.co/83CYaMVRy6 Mon Jul 02 12:02:58 +0000 2018
• 2 people followed me and 2 people unfollowed me // automatically checked by https://t.co/yRgI1VBdDc Sun Jul 01 16:27:56 +0000 2018
• I still want to call it “Dominion Day” Sun Jul 01 16:16:04 +0000 2018
• “Poetry is bad stand-up. It’s carefully chosen words with no laugh at the end.” -Jerry Seinfeld Sun Jul 01 16:09:18 +0000 2018
• “They say pimpin’ ain’t easy. What they don’t tell you is that it’s even more difficult being a prostitute.” -Norm MacDonald. Sun Jul 01 15:43:37 +0000 2018
• .@nbarrowman https://t.co/0fBT9nHj9U Sun Jul 01 13:59:28 +0000 2018

Archived Twitter tweets from 2018-06-01 to 2018-06-30, courtesy of the Twime Machine:

Continue reading Twitter Tweets from 6-1-18 TO 6-30-18 →

Archived Twitter tweets from 2018-05-01 to 2018-05-31, courtesy of the Twime Machine:

Continue reading Twitter Tweets from 5-1-18 to 5-31-18 →