Go Jump Off The Mountains U Bitch

Oh, this is hilarious. I googled “Deonandan” (because, hey, I’m an egotist) and found a teen chat site with one of the participants named “Sarah Deonandan” (no relation, that I know of). This little foul-mouthed vixen is an inspiration:

Dane Ramirez: Hi, I am 13 and I am from Colorado

Sarah Deonandan: who gives a shit

Alyssa Ramirez: I do, what the hell is your problem??

Sarah Deonandan:
why r u bugging the hell out of me
who gives a fuck that your 13
since your in colorado go jump off the mountains u
bitch

Ahh, youth. So innocent, so pure.

I promised I’d share with you an anecdote about the recent high school reunion. Well, from 1981 to 1986 my good buddy David Kennedy and I were obsessed with space travel. We made a pledge at 14 to be the first men on Mars. For our grade 12 special project (we were in a gifted programme so there were special projects galore) we designed a manned mission to the rings of Saturn, complete with crew recommendations and efficiency specs for the fusion engine. We called it “Caravan To Cronus.” (The slideshow presentation that went with the project was gold, complete with Batman and Robin figurines on the surface of Iapetus, i.e. Dave’s back yard.)

Anyway, during those years Dave I took turns taking a single book out of the library: T.A. Heppenheimer’s Toward Distant Suns. No one else in the school had yet taken it out, and we were determined that no one else ever would. So for five years we ensured that the book was always in our possession. This meant checking it out and returning it every 2 weeks –for 5 years. (Note: the book wasn’t that great, but this is the sort of shit that teenagers do; see Sarah Deonandan above.)

I went back to the high school library this past weekend, almost 20 years after we left. The book is still there, but there’s a new check-out card in the back, and mine and Dave’s names are no longer there. Sniff.