Doggy Style


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Today’s Daily Perv Link (TM) is a follow-up of an earlier entry. As was reported in this space some time ago, Ronald E. Kuch was caught having penetrative sex with a dead dog. It seems he has been charged with sodomy and indecent exposure, and may be sentenced to up to 22 years in prison for his crimes.

So many questions abound, not the least of which being, “What the hell was he thinking?” But if40 years of life on Earth has taught me anything, is that one should never bother trying to understand the precise mindset of those on the fringes; some thoughts will always be inaccessible to us.

So, instead let us ask the logical question few in the mainstream will have the courage to publicly voice: what exactly did he do that warrants jail time? Indecent exposure? Sure, I’ll give you that. In my personal opinion, exposure of the human body should never be criminalized, but I recognize that my view is marginal at best, so I’ll let that one go.

But sodomy? Methinks the laws of many jurisdictions consider sodomy to be any sexual penetrative act committed by a man on anything other than a human vagina. By that definition, masturbation or the use of sex dolls and other such personal apparatus would also be illegal. Seems a stretch to me.

As readers of this blog know, I am quite horrified by the increasing reports of the sexual abuse of animals. Cruelty against a living animal usually nets a perp a few months or a hefty fine and community service –never 22 years! In my opinion, those who physically harm living animals in anything other than an agricultural capacity deserve to experience the full heft of our penal system.

But a dead animal? The law recognizes the dishonouring of a human corpse to be a crime, but says nothing of non-human corpses.

Put aside the obvious ooginess of the act, but explain to me how coitus with a dead animal is any more wrong than playing football with a plucked chicken (what, you haven’t tried that?) or treating a side of beef as a punching bag (you saw Rocky, right?) I’m legally allowed to do any disgusting thing I want to a hunk of steak I buy from the grocery store, even –let’s be blunt– get jiggy wi’ it.

So, in our society which treats animal flesh as a commodity like any other, how is the placing of one’s penis in dead animal flesh a crime? Well, maybe this deer has an answer.