Scrambling Wingnuts

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police raided the headquarters of the Conservative Party of Canada, at the request of Elections Canada. For my non-Canadian readers, the RCMP is the equivalent of Canada’s federal police (like the FBI in the USA and the Federales in Mexico); and the Conservative Party is the current ruling party of Canada. Elections Canada is the government body –held religiously at arms length from the political bodies, for obvious reasons– that is tasked with making sure that all of Canada’s democratic processes are fair and legal.

The news report gave no indication of why the warrant was issued. But typically such drastic measures do not take place unless there is strong suspicion that federal election laws, possibly of a monetary nature, were being broken by the Conservative Party. All this comes within shouting distance of a possible election call.

Of course, those of us who hate this despicable, regressive, corrupt, ideological and unscientific government giggle in glee at this news. But let’s remember that the investigation is still underway, and it would be premature to jump to any conclusions regarding (a) the reasons for the raid, and (b) the guilt of the Party.

However, what’s really curious is to see how the right wing blogosphere has been responding to the news. Remember that the Conservatives are the “law and order” party, the one likes to lick the boots of anyone in uniform, give all sorts of lip service to “rules” and “honour” and other hollow formularies of shallow thought. Thus, it’s all the more delicious to see the apologists scurry with rationales such as these:

“…it was a perfect example of the kind of bully tactics the folks at Elections Canada like to use to intimidate anyone who dares to oppose them.” –Gerry Nichols, Conservative Party insider, commenting at that bastion of supreme hypocritical banality, the Western Standard Blog.

“Where’s the crime here? Campaign finance laws should be scraped.” -Matthew Johnston, Western Standard Blog. Gee, Matthew, whatever happened to the ruling party obeying the law?

“What bothers me is that the RCMP raided the offices of a political party to enforce a law that should either be entirely ignored or enforced lightly and discretely.” -same Matthew Johnston above, completely and willfully ignorant of the fact that the governing party cannot pick and choose which laws to follow.

“In this democracy, one does not have to lie down and let the state screw you. One is lawfully required to resist.” -dewp, also at the Western Standard. Um… who’s screwing whom? This particular party IS the state!

“Oh drat! They’re on to Harper! How dare he try to make life better for people outside of Toronto!” –Zebulon Pike. Yeah, because Toronto runs both Elections Canada and the RCMP. Jesus Christ.

And on and on it goes. It’s all oh so sweet. Even if nothing comes of this investigation, the nature of these apologist scramblings are instructive enough.

And since I’m lacking a photo for this particular post, I leave you with a giraffe humping a donkey… or, as the kids say, “tapping that ass”:


PS. It looks kinda fake to me.