Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2011-09-26

• If your last name is "Hunt" and your first name is "Michael", it's ill-advised to shorten it to "Mike." Just sayin'. #fb #
• On Via 327 to Ottawa. Anyone else here? Or there? Or on the roof? #fb #
• Chicks in the men's room. Yep, still in Quebec. #fb #
• Sunday morning Chinese foot massage! #fb #
• My thanks and congratulations to the graduate students of McGill University for running a splendid science policy symposium this weekend #fb #
• Misleading US TV ad: "As baby boomers retire, we'll need 1 million new teachers!" Uh, no. That's not how it works. #fb #
• Of course a Holiday Inn in Quebec would have a tanning bed #fb #
• Dear Mr Quinton "Rampage" Jackson. I just placed a bet that you will pulverize Jon "Bones" Jones. Please win me some burrito money. #fb #
• I'm at M Cafe (1458 rue de la Montagne, at Boulevard de Maisonneuve, Montréal) http://t.co/ZRUeuG3A #
• Apples and coffee for breakfast again. What's up with Montreal hotels and the plethora of apples? #fb #
• Sign of a good hotel: free Q-tips. Mind you, the flat screen TV in the shower is a bit much. #fb #
• Sour apples, discount cheese and hotel coffee: breakfast of champions. #fb #
• "Gordon Ramsay's Porn Dwarf Double Eaten by Badger" http://t.co/2cuwplBU #fb #
• Just realized by 9:am presentation at McGill is actually at 4pm. It's like getting an extra day of life! #fb #
• Even the IGA in Montreal has cooler food, gourmet wines, and stylish customers. #fb #
• About to board Porter 427 to Montreal. Anyone else here? Est-ce qu'il y a quelqu'un d'autre ici? #fb #
• If this is true, then does it mean that neutrinos are traveling backwards in time? http://t.co/lqwy3kyT #fb #
• "40 is the old age of youth; 50 is the youth of old age.” Victor Hugo #
• My namesake: the sperm injection machine #fb http://t.co/MYudYWUN #
• Just tried out an exhibitor's intracytoplasmic sperm injection machine. Ironically, that's also my nickname. #fb #
• At CFAS: just met a superhot babe who runs a sperm bank in USA. Insert your own inappropriate comments here. #fb #
• I'm at The Fairmont Royal York (100 Front St W, btw York & Bay, Toronto) http://t.co/g2df3UDp #
• Clearly our "War criminal filter" at the border is defective http://t.co/JozS2IY8 #fb #
• What's up with young people and their annoying nasally voices? Are sinuses getting smaller or something? #fb #
• Krugman, byatches http://t.co/3cDQnNBT #fb #
• Trying to conduct a Skype meeting in a hotel lobby while a TV reporter interviews people next to me. Distracting. #fb #
• At the conference of the Canadian Fertility & Andrology Society. Damn, there's a lot of money here. #fb #
• I'm at The Fairmont Royal York (100 Front St W, btw York & Bay, Toronto) http://t.co/x3uATI2p #
• Stop. Burrito time. #fb #
• I'm at Harbourfront (Queens Quay W, btwn Yonge & Bathurst, Toronto) http://t.co/Fg3ivkM0 #
• Back in Toronto. Feels like I was just here yesterday… #fb #
• I'm at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport Ferry (2 Bathurst St., Toronto) w/ 3 others http://t.co/or9m7hee #
• About to board (overpriced) Porter 278 to toronto. Anyone else here? #fb #
• Damn. Flight's delayed and I forgot my comic books! #fb #
• I'm at Ottawa MacDonald-Cartier International Airport (YOW) (1000 Airport Parkway Pvt, Ottawa) w/ 7 others http://t.co/zFXn8udp #
• :Twitter haiku 305 – "Writing a film script / About teachers in Belgrade / Name: 'To Serb With Love'" #fb #
• I'm at Riverside Court Medical Clinic (3635 Rivergate Way, Riverside, Ottawa) http://t.co/4466LsWQ #
• I'm at Baker Street Cafe (385 Richmond Rd, at Winston Ave, Ottawa) http://t.co/TVNBUWTq #
• My vow of a carb-free Tuesday ends with a basket of rye bread and a side of home fries 🙁 #fb #
• Guess what I'm doing this aft, bitches? Two hour foot massage! Oh yeah. #fb #
• Oh come on! Who gives a parking ticket to a freakin' scooter? #fb #
• I have to admit, whenever someone mentions "Stittsville", in my head I silently remove the first "s". #fb #
• The downside of trying to write in a cafe: Everyone is eating French fries… and the smell is driving me nuts! #fb #
• Ewww. The ugly couple at the table in front of me is making out. Ewww! #fb #
• Just met with a student who was born 3 years after the first Gulf War. Man, I feel old. #fb #
• I'm at Cafe Nostalgica (2-36 Université Pvt, at Cumberland St, Ottawa) http://t.co/xQLXRtz7 #
• "Newsweek names U of T 1 of top 3 unis outside US http://t.co/Q7NjUp79". How generous. We should name Harvard 1 of top 3 outside Canada #fb #
• On Porter 245 to Ottawa. Anyone else here? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone? #fb #
• What's up with the 6am migraines on a day on which i have to take a flight, give 2 lectures and edit a slough of papers? Auuuugh! #fb #
• I'm at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport Ferry (2 Bathurst St., Toronto) http://t.co/vuhmAfkS #
• Two papers rejected in one week! Guess I should stop signing them "Otto Von Cocks'n'shlagen" #fb #