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Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-02-06

By Raywat, February 6, 2012

To whoever left the Shatner book in my office mailbox: thanks, but you’re still not getting that A+ #fb #
Dammit! I’m craving 1:AM Indian take-out again. #fb #
My surrogacy feature is now available in a more accessible format: http://t.co/cnnn9gFx #fb #
Indigo describes my novel: “As a guerrilla war rages aross the Zimbabwe countryside, a young woman finds refuge” Uh, that’s not my book #fb #
“I don’t think the half-time entertainer should ever be older than the Superbowl itself.” -Piers Morgan #fb #
I found a way to get tipsy from pasta sauce. #fb #
Sigh. Six more reference letters done. Is grad school application season over yet?!! #fb #
So will someone please tell me when this football thing is over? #fb #
Here’s the problem with Ottawa: nowhere to get Indian take-out at 3:AM #fb #
Condit totally deserved that win #ufc143 #
Wow. Jousting is now a 21st century sport. The world truly is out of new ideas. #fb #
I think I’m officially a bok choi addict #fb #
Just to be different, I’m calling it Condit in round 3 by TKO #ufc143 #fb #
Yep, another paper submitted #fb #
Ain’t nothin’ like late night, drunken pizza #fb #
Why do I have a LinkedIn account again? #fb #
I’m at Shanghai Restaurant (651 Somerset Street West, Ottawa) http://t.co/rldApvJj #
Just opened junk mail that began, “Ray, I’m guess you, like millions of other older men…” AUUUGHHHH!!!! #fb #
Any epidemiologists looking for a job in Toronto? Here’s one: http://t.co/gzZV6A4A #fb #
Getting all spa’d out today. Shut up. I deserve it. #fb #
One paper rejected, one paper accepted for publication. Starting out the day even. #fb #
This month is the 100th anniversary of Edgar Rice Burrough’s first publication #fb #
Just cooked with a whole bottle of wine. I like that I can get tipsy from eating pasta. #fb #
The Politicization of Science — trying to keep some of my older articles in circulation http://t.co/IAIlJGvj #fb #
My latest on Indian maternal surrogacy, the cover story of “India Currents” magazine (Access embedded document reader) http://t.co/lhOZqovN #
Well…. fuck. http://t.co/dsVDtosT #fb #
2 pitchers of beer, one paper submitted, one grant application submitted, 2 hours of sleep, and now the work day begins…#fb #
Scrambled egg and bok choi — not my best idea #fb #
One more paper completed and submitted. #fb #
Things I have learned today: The Lancet enforces the Oxford comma. #fb #
Hallelujah! Got my paper to exactly 300 words. #fb #
Still need to knock 73 words out of my manuscript. Sigh. Time to remove the profanity… #fb #
:Twitter haiku 315 – “When Harry Potter / Forgot to wear a condom / Genital Hogwarts” #fb #
It’s true. I am indeed that man from Nantucket. #fb #
After chopping 9000 words out of an overlong paper, I’m struggling to carve out the last 100. #fb #
I’m at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport (YTZ) (Toronto Island, Toronto) w/ 4 others http://t.co/0oRlJNbw #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-01-30

By Raywat, January 30, 2012

Just hacked a 12000 word paper down to 3000 words. I feel like I just crapped out a lung and both kidneys. #fb #
Just realized that “The Starlost” (crappy 70s Canadian SF) was written by the legendary Harlan Ellison. Oh, Harlan. #fb #
Arrrgh. Two papers rejected within 24 hours of each other. Couldn’t they at least space out the notices? #fb #
I’m at Hey Lucy (440 Bloor Street West, Howland, Toronto) http://t.co/6fLoOAnz #
Porter Air, usually you’re great. But today your staff are just effin’ idiots. #fb #
Inbox down to 90. Time for a bottle of wine and a nap. Oh crap, I have to get to the airport… #fb #
Did a manuscript search for housing studies in Chad… and got one about nomadic surfers in California. Yep, one was named Chad. #fb #
Four more reference letters done. At this point, I’m referring to everyone as, “Sparky.” #fb #
One grant application completed and submitted… before noon! #fb #
Top search term driving people to my science fiction website (http://t.co/u0QeDkFG) is still “Terra Nova sucks” #fb #
8 more reference letters done, and it’s only 10AM #fb #
This week’s top search terms driving people to my blog: “shtupper”, “emo bitch” and “gay cats” #fb #
Didn’t Dumbledore defeat Grimbergen to win the Elder wand? #fb http://t.co/wENaIEUG #
Fettuccine Bolognese and a whole bottle of wine. And when the tipsy hits, time to write some reference letters… #fb #
One more paper completed and submitted #fb #
Had a steak, took a nap. Woke up, had another steak. I detect a pattern here. #fb #
(When typing “grilling steaks on the roof”, Android autocorrected “roof” to “typhoid.” Hmm. ) #fb #
Grilling steaks on the roof #fb #
Just downloaded all 48GB of the Babylon 5 saga. Guess how I’m spending this evening? #fb #
I’m having nachos and cheese. Hold the nachos. #fb #
Nachos is a balanced meal, right? #fb #
Yo, suits, instead of, “at this time,” how about you just say, “now”? #fb #
6:AM fire alarm while I’m pulling an all-nighter. So I’m now working from McDonald’s. Sigh. #fb #
I think I’m the only one who gets midnight bok choi cravings. #fb #
Crampons and tampons are interchangeable #FactsWithoutWikipedia #fb #
What do we want?! “Gradual change!” When do we want it?! “Incrementally!” #billmaher #fb #
Here’s proof. I’m on the Hogwarts Express! #fb http://t.co/E6R04MYg #
Nerdy bespectacled and uniformed private school kids on the train with me. ZOMG! It’s the Hogwarts Express! #fb #
:Twitter haiku 314 – “Desi kangaroo / Taught to sell tea on the streets / A chai wallahby” #fb #
Thank you, Union Station, for bathrooms that make me think I’m back in India. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-01-23

By Raywat, January 23, 2012

12 more reference letters down. You do realize I’m referring to each of you as “whatsisname”, right? #fb #
I’m at Ice Lounge (560 Danforth Ave, Carlaw Ave, Toronto) http://t.co/SOVy2wWy #
I’m at Crema Coffee Co. (508 Danforth Ave, Logan Ave, Toronto) http://t.co/12ZrFz4G #
I’m at World Exchange Plaza (100 Queen Street, Metcalfe Street, Ottawa) w/ 2 others http://t.co/RicwtUO6 #
Oh man, baby bok choy sauteed in peanut oil is soooo good. #fb #
Just re-watched the Babylon 5 finale, “Sleeping In Light”, the finest 45 minutes of televised science fiction ever produced. #fb #
You know it’s going to be a bad day when your building’s fire alarm goes off just as you’re stepping into the shower. #fb #
AUUUUUGHHHH!!!!! http://t.co/PXuh6Wq1 #
This week’s top search terms bringing people to my website: “busty idiots” and “boner pants” #fb #
Dear Epidemiology grad students, consider submitting a paper to the ACE student competition: http://t.co/tmCgGeau #fb #
“The Adobe Acorbat plugin has crashed.” Bloatware that updates ever 10 minutes, and it doesn’t even work reliably. Grrrr. #fb #
I support #wikipediablackout Show your support here http://t.co/y4sD2sF4 #
Suddenly feel the need to re-watch some Babylon 5 episodes. #fb #
There’s a NEW Mexico #FactsWithoutWikipedia #fb #
To protect archaic, bloated, spoiled and inefficient industries, #SOPA threatens our access to the greatest free resource in history #fb #
Dear Google and Wikpedia: you go, girl. Dear MPAA and SOPA: welcome to the scrap heap of history, you retrograde dinosaurs. #fb #
Was going offline today to protest SOPA. But best to use the time to tell those still online why SOPA is bad: http://t.co/n6igMG7K #fb #
One more paper accepted for publication… #fb #
Cheap wine, a pirate movie and bacon-flavoured chocolate. #fb #
Just got a flyer from Rogers asking that I switch to them for Internet, cable and phone service. Pause. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! #fb #
Writing retreat almost over: 1 paper revised, 1 whole newsletter completed, 1 magazine article finished, and didn’t download p0rn once! #fb #
Dear Health Sciences students, the deadline for the next issue of the student journal is a week away! http://t.co/xlfY545L #fb #
I’m declaring it now. I will fight the new Facebook “timeline” format to the bitter end. #fb #
Currently at UOttawa faculty “writing retreat”. So far, one paper has been successfully revised, and at least 6 Facebook updates posted #fb #
Latest gift from a student. Clearly, they’re doing their research. And I do teach research, after all. http://t.co/tk3UYpaS #
Today’s green smoothie: Swiss chard, baby bok choi, ginger, cucumbers, beets and fresh apple juice. #fb #
The best part about cooking with wine is disposing of the leftover ingredients. #fb #
Turkey breast Bolognese? Okay, let’s give it a shot… #fb #
Just found out my students are auctioning me off for charity. I hope they realize my liver probably isn’t worth much. #fb #
In exchange for a lecture, Medicine gave me $20 Starbucks coffee card on the wknd. Twenty four hours later, I’ve already maxed it out. #fb #
Am going to be external examiner at someone’s PhD defence in Quebec…. in French. Gulp. #fb #
I’m at Simard Building | Pavillon Simard – uOttawa (165 Waller, Ottawa) http://t.co/CNb1vBsj #
Awkward when the grocery store check-out girl is one of my current students. Quick! Put back that magazine! #fb #
Humidifer is set to jungle. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-01-16

By Raywat, January 16, 2012

4:20AM and the inbox is down to 77. Good enough, yes? #fb #
Three more reference letters down. Whew. #fb #
That’s right. Another paper submitted. #fb #
“The Golden Globes: the one night of the year Americans give a shit what foreigners think.” -Bill Maher #fb #
Just wrote and submitted FIVE research abstracts to a conference. Ack. Time for scotch. #fb #
One more grant application completed and submitted, and the work evening has just begun! #fb #
Decadent brunch at the NAC #fb http://t.co/7ZM8prjV #
RT “@RealTimeWWII: Death-rates among Jewish pop of Warsaw now 70/day: Typhus epidemic”. Under-discussed epidemiological aspect of WWII #
Time for some 5:AM Scotch #fb #
RT @MMAFighting: Aldo probably took more damage from the rabid crowd swarming all over him than he did from Mendes. #
Holy crap…again #ufc142 #
Holy crap #ufc142 #spinningwheelkick #fb #
This is what grilling in the snow looks like #fb http://t.co/kmSNlvy6 #
Grilling steaks on the roof in -1000 degree weather. Welcome to Ottawa. #fb #
Dear student, the word you’re looking for is “drawn”, as in, “the lines were drawn.” Sadly, “drute” is not a word. #fb #
Taxes all done. Time to make some 2:AM beet juice. The neighbours are gonna love me… #fb #
2010 personal taxes done. Now on to the corporate taxes. Shh, don’t tell anyone I’m so late! #fb #
My 2010 Fido bill = $3032. My 2011 Mobilicity bill = $504. Screw you, Rogers/Fido. #fb #
Eight more reference letters done. I need to lie down. #fb #
Got a serious chapati craving. What’s that all about? #fb #
Definitely a neti pot sort of day #fb #
stale wine + apple juice + beet juice = not bad #fb #
Emma Frost was always more interesting than Jean Grey #fb #
Oh crap. Sniffles and a dry throat. This can’t be good. #fb #
One more paper completed and submitted… #fb #
Just ate a bag of kiwis and am still hungry. Damn. #fb #
“Q: How do you make holes in fire? A: With a fire drill, of course.” Ah, memories of the Usenet Oracle. #fb #
On this date, 2063 years ago, Caesar crossed the Rubicon #fb #
Reviewed a paper for BMJ and they gave me a free subscription. Now that’s peer appreciation! #fb #
Reminiscing about when “5 inch floppy” meant a computer medium and not the other thing. #fb #
Latest gift from a student: money tree with a Guyanese name, complete with two bottles of gin http://t.co/1vdoglNM #
Whew! Just wrote 12 reference letters. Hope I put the right ones in the right envelopes. #fb #
Re-watching season 6 of Stargate-SG1. Damn, I miss that show. #fb #
“@BillGates: Major milestone: India to mark 1 year since last polio case. http://t.co/Y24gPwVv" #fb #
Re-watching Jeeves & Wooster. That Hugh Laurie has barely aged a day! #fb #
You can follow the IJHS student journal on Facebook: https://t.co/oz4qTY5T #fb #
Can I squeeze in a nap between now and my next lecture? I say yes. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-01-09

By Raywat, January 9, 2012

Inbox down to 65 at it's 2:AM. Meh. That's good enough for today. #fb #
Inbox down to 74, and it's only 1:AM! #fb #
Re-launching the website for the Health Sciences student journal: http://t.co/7e9Kdp7s @RISSIJHS #fb #
Random fact: during the empire, the average Roman man ate 2 lbs of bread per day. No low-carb diet for them! #fb #
Note to self: when making fresh beet juice, don't wear a white shirt. #fb #
One more paper accepted for publication. Sweet. #fb #
Shirley Temple is still alive. Who knew? #fb #
Watching 1955's "The Dambusters". Did a spit take when they first say the name of the dog. #fb #
Cooking with wine is dangerous on a school night. #fb #
Just watched 1958's "The Vikings". Don't make 'em like that anymore. #fb #
Random trivia of the day: actor Christopher Guest is a British peer (Lord). Wacky. #fb #
My first Ottawa breakfast of 2012 includes…. bacon! #fb #
A little concerned by how few of my 4th year students are able to multiply 20 x 0.6 correctly without a calculator. #fb #
Who wants to buy me a knitted Ninja Turtle mask? http://t.co/cs9QRplP #
I love Fear Factor. But do they only cast Hooters girls and douchebags? #fb #
I think we can all agree that when my month-old plain yogurt has turned hard and yellow, it probably isn't edible anymore. #fb #
Inbox at 93 and the work evening has only just begun… #fb #
Holy crap. Season premiere of "Sherlock" is simply brilliant screenwriting. #fb #
Back in the O town #fb #
About to board Porter 251 to Ottawa. Anyone else here? If so, don't talk to me. I gots comic books to read. #fb #
My fave adjective-noun combination from today's news: "wayward puffin." Good name for a band. A weak, indie band. #fb #
Dear Porter Air. You know I'm a fan. But what you really need is more bathroom capacity in the YTZ lounge. #fb #
"@InjusticeFacts: A US pornstar makes an average of $250,000, a US senator makes $160,000." Porn stars r underpaid 4 the joy they bring #fb #
"@The_Activists: Why does an American porn star make more money than an American senator?" Because they do more for the public. #fb #
I'm at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport (YTZ) (2 Eireann Quay, Toronto) w/ 2 others http://t.co/NxN35jEz #
Overheard two stupid girls talking on the Porter ferry: "My friend is totally loaded. He's got his own house and everything." #fb #
I'm at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport Ferry (2 Bathurst St., Toronto) http://t.co/za0EfucO #
"@factlets: Boobies' blue feet get brighter the longer it has been since they last had sex." Boobies with feet. Sounds hentai-ish. #fb #
Back to Ottawa tomorrow. Please inform the city that the ticker-tape parade will not be necessary, though I do appreciate the thought. #fb #
Crazy man on subway is lecturing invisible audience on various types of shoes. I was interested until he started getting his facts wrong #fb #
Exam marks submitted, eight reference letters written, inbox down to 99… time for an X-Men comic book and some shut-eye. #fb #
Uhoh. It's reference letter season…. #fb #
Oh come on. How they expect me to get any work done with both Stargate and UFC on TV? #fb #
Jeebus Cripes! Enough with the Twitter spam! #fb #
It's sad that I'm excited by this, but George Takei will be on this season's Celebrity Apprentice! Whoohoo! #fb #
I love that CBC broadcasters are forced to pronounce "kilometre" correctly. #fb #
Oh, Jeebus, this Santorum fellow sounds just idiotic enough to get the nomination. #fb #
The Quadrantid are supposed to start at 2:30AM. Who's going to brave the cold tonight? #fb #
Dear loud kids arguing on the street outside, "lookit" is not a word. #fb #
Time for a Top Gear break. No one do anything funny or interesting till I get back. #fb #
New year's resolution #2 I resolve to use the Oxford comma. #fb #
I'm at Sushi On Bloor (515 Bloor St W, at Borden St, Toronto) http://t.co/SHeFPQxC #
I'm at Indigo Books & Music (55 Bloor Street West, at Bay Street, Toronto) w/ 2 others http://t.co/F3eltcTr #
I'm at Park Hyatt Toronto (4 Avenue Road, Bloor, Toronto) http://t.co/OuxjfACG #
I'm at Sarah's Shawarma & Falafel (487 Bloor St W, at Brunswick Av, Toronto) http://t.co/4LtLCE2a #
Inbox holding at 105. Time to move shop to downtown cafe… #fb #
Inbox holding at 109. Bah. #fb #
Inbox down to a measly 156…. #fb #
To everyone who's been waiting for an email response from me for 2 weeks… This afternoon is when I will start replying #fb #
Isaac Asimov would have been 92 today #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2012-01-02

By Raywat, January 2, 2012

4:AM snack — apple pie and bacon #fb #
Today’s random trivia: the teo actors who portrayed Col Henry Blake in MASH (TV and movie) died 24 hours apart. #fb #
My new year’s resolution: to dress my age. #fb #
Oooo. Pawn Stars marathon. #fb #
What is Hayden Christiansen doing in “Return of the Jedi”? Get off my TV! #fb #
A day spent napping, with intermittent breaks just for meals and Tweeting, can’t be good for the waistline. #fb #
First important task of 2012: gonna watch me some Cowboys and Aliens. #fb #
First meal of 2012 involves…. bacon. #fb #
“Climate scientists are only in it for the money.” Seriously, someone said this. Because the path to riches is through a PhD #jeez #fb #
Also picking cowboy by decision and matyushenko by ko #ufc141 #
I’m calling it now. Overeem by TKO in 2nd round #ufc141 #fb #
I’m at The Fairmont Royal York (100 Front St W, btw York & Bay, Toronto) w/ 3 others http://t.co/jmeOTxAX #
:Twitter haiku 313 – “A one storey house / Flooded with backed up sewage / Call it, ‘bungalow’” #fb #
Too bad. http://t.co/KyuoOVnS #fb #
That’s right, one more paper done. (Well, a draft for the co-authors, anyway). #fb #
Everything you need to know about boobs: http://t.co/L9tQ1iDj #fb #
Oh codeine, My migraine and I are so your bitches. #fb #
It seems “Merlin” is the British “Smallville” #fb #
Nothing says productivity like a snowstorm, cup of fresh dal, a Merlin marathon on TV, and a backlog of papers to be writ… #
That’s right. One more paper completed and submitted. #
Jeebus, people, stop adding “LOL” to statements that aren’t funny! LOL. #fb #
Just saw Justin Bieber on TV for the 1st time (seriously). He’s actually a butchy girl, right? #fb #
10 illegal baby names — I kinda like “Sexfruit” http://t.co/rkgER1dk #
Just finished two manuscript revisions I’ve been putting off for a YEAR! #
Writing in a Starbucks, berated by the mindless, loud chatter of the stupidest sounding undergrad girls I have ever heard. #fb #
Korean Grillhouse, 214 Queen St http://t.co/IrAvHgYE #
I’m at Korean Grill House (214 Queen Street W., Toronto) http://t.co/mhHw2fmg #
Just installed gel insoles. Well hello. #fb #
That’s right… one more paper completed and submitted. And it’s only 4:30AM. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2011-12-26

By Raywat, December 26, 2011

(Oops, that should have been Twitter haiku 312, no 311) #
:Twitter haiku 311 – "Admiral Akbar / 'Sound of Music' cameo / 'It's a Von Trapp!'" #fb #
:Twitter haiku 311 – "North Korean prez / Passed after lengthy sickness / …He was Kim Jong 'Ill'" #fb #
In my efforts to procrastinate writing another paper, I actually got a whole grant application done. Methinks 'tis time for gin. #fb #
Should I spend New Year's in Toronto or Ottawa? Discuss and offer options. And….. go. #fb #
I'm at Shoppers World (3003 Danforth Ave, at Victoria Park Ave, Toronto) http://t.co/zpCGzMSy #
Summer opportunity for global health students. Deadline is Jan 30, 2012: http://t.co/wreDmvuo #fb #
Internship opportunity for global health students. Deadline is Feb 17, 2012: http://t.co/fUhYsHud #fb #
Toronto skyline from the Park Hyatt rooftop lounge http://t.co/DnZBtZVs #
Ate another danish #fb #
I'm at Park Hyatt Roof Lounge (4 Avenue Rd., at Bloor St. W, Toronto) http://t.co/xlhuN3Yy #
Can't decide. Is it good or bad that my optician gave me a shot of whiskey after selling me glasses? #fb #
Two more papers completed and submitted, and it's only 4:AM! #fb #
Wine and Youtube are not conducive to marking #fb #
Today would have been the 124th birthday of Ramanujan http://t.co/prbWcdDX #fb #
Good Zod… it's a Richard Grieco movie. Made for TV, of course. #fb #
An old study, but worth remembering: kids are getting dumber. http://t.co/D8FVGdfP #fb #
I'm at Costco (1411 Warden Av., at Canadian Rd, Scarborough) http://t.co/75PUrsk7 #
Happiness is: zero credit card debt in the middle of the Xmas season. #fb #
Another sign of middle age: just pulled a muscle in my back just THINKING about doing a push-up. #fb #
Someone just found my website by searching for "Nazi jailbait." I'm so proud. #fb #
ZOMG there's actually a gameshow in which people try to fit through a hole in the wall. Who needs actual knowledge or skills? #fb #
:Twitter haiku 309 – "Chunky prostitues / You can eat them with a fork / But use a spoontang" #fb #
Back in T'ranna, bitches #fb #
I'm at Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport Ferry (2 Bathurst St., Toronto) w/ 2 others https://t.co/9XkR1TE1 #
After tonight's Yogi Bear marathon, I'll be having a Happy Hanna-Barbera-ka. #fb #
:Twitter haiku 310 – "An Indian Jew / Eats chick peas in December / Happy Channa-ka" #fb #
Final page of student's stats exam, showing the Tardis finally materializing after 18 pages of flipping. http://t.co/tXWctECD #
Whoa. Student exam is actually a flipbook showing the materialization of the Tardis in the lower right corner! #fb #
A student just submitted an exam she'd turned into a static Pac-Man game. Impressive, but no extra points. #fb #
Some weirdo just walked into my exam room looking for directions. #fb #
Stats students just caught a massive conceptual error I made on an exam question. Yes, the students have become the teacher. #fb #
And the stats exam begins…… now. #fb #
I've been predicting the return of the age of the airship for some time now. http://t.co/UpYsWmoM #fb #
Just saw a senior run two red lights and park on the sidewalk. It's okay, though, since his hazard lights were on. #fb #
This year's most annoying Canadians http://t.co/ibKafQRB #fb #
Genius is linked to weirdness. But we all knew that. http://t.co/1Y1TCLdP #fb #
Four hours sleep, 2 hour workout, a morning filled with meetings. Time for a gin-filled breakfast? #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2011-12-19

By Raywat, December 19, 2011

This week’s top search term leading people to my science fiction website (http://t.co/u0QeDkFG): “Terra Nova sucks.” #fb #
This week’s top search term leading people to my blog: “medical school rejection letter.” #fb #
Words that I live by: “Keep the company of those who seek the truth; run from those who have found it.” RIP Václav Havel #fb #
Damn it. I still miss the frack out of Stargate. (All of them.) #fb #
New snack: yogurt and bacon. Yes, that’s right. #fb #
iPhone makes a Blackberry? #chineseknockoffs #fb http://t.co/Lg6iKaOy #
Just saw a dude with a Hitler moustache. I guess they’re back. (The moustaches, not the Nazis.) #fb #
Yet one more paper completed and submitted. #fb #
There’s an old Chinese woman next to me in the TTC clapping her hands in various directions. Is she expelling foul spirits or just nuts? #fb #
I’m at Greenwood Station (1177 Danforth Ave, at Greenwood Av, Toronto) http://t.co/AHrbsg1u #
Dear stats students, only 3 more days of studying left. Mwahahaha. #fb #
Today is Bradley Manning’s 24th birthday. Get that boy out of prison! #fb #
Gonna gets me some Pacific Mall. Chinese food and comic books, here I come. #fb #
Guess who won $200 of spa treatments tonight? Hint: he’s got a green scooter and likes bacon. #fb #
Fish tacos at Joey’s http://t.co/embdD0hQ #
Encountering strange fauna in Toronto @twomangoes http://t.co/xHOZVvUp #
I’m at Joey Eaton Centre w/ @jasbanwait @anjali_handa http://t.co/kmP9TAcH #
A day before his 24th birthday, Bradley Manning gets his first day in court. Hero, I say. #fb #
The Munk debate featuring Hitchens and Blair is accessible for FREE for the next 72 hours: http://t.co/5AW40go1 #fb #
I can’t tell if the dude next to me at Starbucks is farting or if that’s just his foul cologne #fb #
Starting paper #3 Can I break my record and get 3 out in 24 hrs? Or will the lure of the gin be too strong to resist? #fb #
Yet another paper completed and submitted. Who da man? #fb #
“If Falwell had been given an enema, he could have been buried in a matchbox.” ~ Christopher Hitchens #fb #
There’s a guy in the Eaton Centre hawking “Vagitarian protein juice.” That… doesn’t… sound… right… #fb #
Another paper completed and submitted. To bed now at 7:45am. YAAWWWN. #fb #
Who needs a free @Dropbox account? YOU do! http://t.co/dbWIYDo5 #
I lean to the Left, but Obama bugs the crap out of me http://t.co/W0EOKQJ8 #
:Twitter haiku 308 – “Dead jazz pianist / Reborn as crooked rodent / Felonious Skunk” #fb #
Watching in awe as person next to me in subway texts… in Chinese. Just how big is that virtual keyboard? #fb #
Peter Kent: disingenuous, duplicitous, short-sighted peddlar of our environmental doom. Or, if you prefer, “piece of sh–” #fb #
Up till 4am creating a stats final exam. A few questions might be… um… stream of conciousness…. #fb #
4:AM Star Trek. That’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout. #fb #
“I’m a steam-powered wooden robot, just as nature intended.” -Bender #fb #
Apparently Scott Baio is NOT dead. In case you were wondering. #fb #
Just finished Harbourfront Centre program meeting. You Toronto residents need to take more advantage of the free shows at Harbourfront! #fb #
Dear Justin Trudeau, Peter Kent’s remarks most decidedly make him a fuddle duddle #fb #
Spicy caesar on the train. And so it begins. http://t.co/PcxnaTOi #
Another sign of middle age: dropping your phone, reaching down to pick it up… and pulling a muscle. #fb #
The snack on Via is called “urban mix”. I half expected a bootleg cd. #fb #
Cripes. The problem with Via One is the large number of self-important business knobs on their cell phones, with no “indoor voice” #fb #
Enjoying the “Real Time World War II” tweets. Can’t wait to see how it all ends! #fb #
In the Via first class lounge. Time to compound my sleeplessness with some drunkenness. #fb #
I propose Julian Assange as Time’s person of the year. #fb #
After it vanished for about a decade, I’ve heard the word “fillip” used twice already today. #fb #
“@qikipedia: Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital. AARON LEVENSTEIN (1911-86)” #fb #
Got a student writing an exam in my office. Need to find somewhere else to nap. Hmm. #fb #
I’m at Father & Sons (112 1/2 Osgoode St, at King Edward Ave, Ottawa) http://t.co/ey1j375v #
2 hour workout at 10pm + all nighter + 1 hour workout at 6am = Ray’s desperate need for carbs, followed by quick unconciousness #fb #
The new watburger: turkey breast, kale, ginger, garlic, onions, soy sauce, mustard and hot sauce; smushed and grilled. Totally gross. #fb #
Mr. Obama, you continue to disappoint me http://t.co/lOGROZgT #fb #
Need more proof that this country is run by irresponsible and scientifically illiterate fucktards? http://t.co/VgufsbnG #fb #
Just saw an old man in a “Viagra” jacket. That takes balls! HAHAHAHAHA! #fb #
I forgot I even had a Google Plus account. #fb #
Off to get a 90 minute massage. Don’t hate. #fb #
A 15 hour fast followed by toast and home fries is NOT the path to fitness. #fb #
(I suppose “why are phlebotomists such PRICKS” would have been funnier.) #fb #
Why are phlebotomists always such dicks? #fb #
Hmm. Somebody just Googled “giraffe humping donkey” to get to my website. Not good. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2011-12-12

By Raywat, December 12, 2011

EGAMOFINK. Yes, that was the answer key to the nine multiple choice questions on tonight’s exam. It’s also my new favourite word. #fb #
I know the odds are poor, but my karate loyalties have me calling tonight’s fight for Machida by KO in the 3rd. #fb #
Proctoring an exam at 7pm on a Saturday night. Sigh. #fb #
Celebrating the first exam of the semester with a foot-long Subway double-stuffed roast beast sandwich. #fb #
I love MMA, but I really don’t much like MMA fans. #fb #
Student with surname “Butt” submitted his/her assignment via email, subject line: “Butt Ass.” #fb #
Dear relaity show contestants: please find another word to express your feelings (about pretty much anything) other than “awesome”. #fb #
Student at career fair: “I want to be an astronaut.” Me: “Why are you at the speech pathology desk?” Not a lot of stuttering spacemen. #fb #
When did “prolly” become a word? #fb #
Kind of hard to sell parents on the merits of our school while students are breakdancing next to our kiosk. #fb #
I’m busy recruiting high school students for our program. All the brown ones keep coming to my table. #fb #
Glass of wine at the hairdresser’s. Ah, my decadent life. #fb http://t.co/oyXcYl6W #
:Twitter haiku 307 – “Got a new name for / A person who wastes my time / A real clock-sucker.” #fb #
Massive breakfast at the Baker Street cafe #fb http://t.co/dj0gP618 #
Celebrating the end of semester with a pound of bacon! #fb #
Stumbled into a party in my condo lobby. *Hic* #fb #
Fellow educators, want to weep for the future? Watch this: http://t.co/zrGTNb8C #
Always nice when my Visa bill has a minus sign in front. #fb #
Tasks for tonight: design 2 exams, write 2 lectures, complete 1 grant application, and finish reading “Ultimate X-Men #9 quot; #fb #
At the Bridgehead coffee shop. Just walked into a glass wall. Loudly. #fb #
Know what I miss? I miss studying calculus. There, I said it. #fb #
Just got an email from an Australian university that actually began with, “G’day”. #fb #
Have to prepare my classes’ exams. I don’t wanna! I don’t wanna! #fb #
Decided to walk through the Arts faculty to see how the other half lives. #fb #
Second last stats class. So sad. Sniff. #fb #
True sign of advancing middle age: dislocating one’s shoulder simply by doing a push-up. Ow. #fb #
Dear whoever stole my bicycle: I’m pretty sure there’s herpes on the seat. #fb #
Well, it seems my bicycle has been stolen. That’s 3 in 6 years. #fb #

Weekly Twitter Tweets for 2011-12-05

By Raywat, December 5, 2011

Just threw out 4 boxes of floppy discs. Hope they didn't contain anything important! #fb #
Southern fried chicken on an herb waffle at the Drake hotel http://t.co/dApIvO1S #
Hmm… finish my paper, go to sleep or watch Oceans 11… #fb #
Pipe cleaner Luke Skywalker. Made it in 1978 when I was 11. http://t.co/uKMIHZgi #
Oh Mayhem. So sad. #
Mayhem, we're all counting on you. #
Marking goes so much easier with a bottle of red wine. #fb #
Why is there a bone in my cupcake? #fb #
Burrito time, muthafrakkers! #fb #
I'm at Mexican Burritos (818 Danforth Avenue, Toronto) http://t.co/oCyo7Yyl #
I'm at Crema Coffee Co. (508 Danforth Ave, Logan Ave, Toronto) http://t.co/EyfpDFEE #
Maybe it's a result of weird translation. But anyone else findings websites with seemingly random text? http://t.co/btzVCESs #fb #
A 3am cardio workout is not a good idea when you have to get up at 7am #fb #
Just realized Biggest Loser Australia is hosted by a white woman named Ajay. In response, some Indian should name his son Jennifer. #fb #
AUUUUUGHHHH!!!! http://t.co/1aT4KlSJ #
Still watching Biggest Loser Australia. I don't know why either. #fb #
One of the many reasons I'm rooting for Mayhem Miller and not this guy: http://t.co/jMQ9iHaU! #
Totally rooting for Mayhem Miller this weekend http://t.co/JWpFLzZ1 via @AOL #
A little addicted to the Australian version of The Biggest Loser. The accents make me giggle. #fb #
Attention U of Ottawa Health Sciences students, the deadline for submission to the IJHS journal has moved to Jan 9, 2012 @RISSIJHS #
1:AM chili is the best kind of chili #fb #
My latest paper -"Driving Deaths and Injuries Post-9/11": http://t.co/1OHlHW76 #
The Biggest Loser: manufacturing drama out of chocolate cake. #fb #
When my massage therapist said she was going to do cupping on me, I was expecting some tender hand-to-moob action #fb #
Tossing old exams from four years ago. Feels so goooood. #fb #
I love Android. And I love that apps are updated regularly. But it seems that they're updating every freakin minute of every freakin day #fb #
All my calories today have come from the cream in my coffee #fb #
My latest paper: http://t.co/XfVCL8XO #
I will now tweet links to my papers– Implications and reflections on the 2010 Supreme Court ruling on Canada's AH… http://t.co/R6HITuK5 #
The top search term driving traffic to my science fiction site (http://t.co/hG8H5oBe) is "terra nova sucks". Interesting– and accurate. #fb #
Tecumseh sounds like a dirty, dirty place. I feel naughty just saying it. #fb #
I've now been wearing pants for 8 consecutive hours today. That's a high for this month. #fb #
At boring lecture. I'm tweeting. Dude on left is shopping for airfares. Pretty sure dude in front is watching Japanese porn. #fb #
Egypt: oldest monarchy is now the youngest democracy… how Caironic! HAHAHAHAHA. #fb #
Anybody else often confuse Margot Kidder with Margaret Trudeau? #fb #
Mumford & Sons are the new Dexy's Midnight Runners #fb #
Dear douchebag businessman holding up the plane's boarding lineup: next time take your "important papers" out BEFORE you reach your seat #fb #
Dear voters in Guyana: good luck today. Sucks that your election happens the same day as Egypt's. #fb #
Concern for the Egyptian election is causing my brow to pharaoh. HAHAHAHAHAHA. #fb #
Dear masculine woman sitting across from me in the miniskirt: please cross your legs; your penis is showing. #fb #
Just bumped into Romeo Dallaire at Toronto Island Airport #myhero #fb #

Political, social, scientific and literary commentary from Dr. Raywat Deonandan: scientist, author, rogue and knave.

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