Nostrawattus, Part 1

Today I hand the reins over to‘s resident prophet and mystic, Count Guiseppe Nostrawattus Almazi. The Count has agreed to forego the usual vague quatrains and will present his predictions in straight-forward plebian language. Take it away, Count….

I, Nostrawattus, have looked into the ether, have drunk of the sacred nectar and have done obeissance before Apollo, god of prophecy. The mists have parted and the hands of heaven have reached down to stroke my forehead and awaken my mind. From the fissure of that divine touch has erupted a third eye, fresh and crisp as that of a child. Mine eye hast found clarity before the ages, its gaze tuned to pierce the walls of time, the barriers that separate epochs. The events of the future, both near and far, have opened themselves to the eye, and a brutish play is performed for me in the ether, soundless yet deafening, blurred yet unmistakable. It is the theatre of Apollo, wherein the gods themselves whisper truth and prophecy from beyond the wings of the stage. And this, O Gentle Readers, is what Apollo has shown me in his play:

  1. The federal Conservative Party of Canada will win a minority government
  2. Paul Martin will come very close to losing his own seat, but will hang on by his nose hairs
  3. Belinda Stronach will not win back her seat
  4. Michael Ignatieff will win a seat for the Liberals and will immediately be appointed Foreign Affairs critic
  5. The NDP will gain seats, mostly in Ontario, and will enjoy power and influence it has not seen since the heady days of Ed Broadbent
  6. the Green Party will elect its first ever sitting MP
  7. Before the end of 2007, Al Gore will return to public life in the USA in a big way
  8. In 2008, Hilary Clinton will make a run for the White House but will fail to win her party’s candidacy
  9. John McCain will announce that he will run again for the Republicans
  10. Before 2008, another major terror attack will occur on US soil
  11. “Coincidentially,” the Bush administration, or its proxies, will move to have the 2008 elections postponed “for national security reasons”
  12. Before the end of 2006, the official US military presence in Iraq will be reduced. However, US military influence will continue to mount, through contractors and foreign proxies
  13. Before 2008, Iran will be attacked, either by the USA, Israel or NATO
  14. Before 2030, there will be a military nuclear exchange somewhere in the world, probably Asia
  15. Before 2010, both China and India will enter the exclusive club of the world’s top 10 economies
  16. Before 2010, the US and Canadian dollars will be of equivalent value
  17. Before the end of 2012, there will be major armed conflict over the disposition of Jerusalem
  18. By 2008, avian flu will have cut a path of death and misery through large parts of the world, then will myseriously disappear mere months after the pandemic’s first bite
  19. By 2010, the “home” of HIV/AIDS will have moved from sub-Saharan African to the urban jungles of Asia
  20. The end of 2006 will see Canada decidedly more politically polarized along the East-West axis, with Western attitudes temporarily holding sway.


Nostrawattus has spoken. The mists return and Apollo’s play comes to an end.