Who’s A Fat-Assed Geek?

Do I really need to add a caption to this photo? Better yet, why don’t you send me your best caption? Include it in the comments section below.

Oh looky looky, the Republinazis are at it again. This time it’s Barry Goldwater’s nephew, Don Goldwater, who’s running on the GOP ticket to be governor of Arizona. His platform includes a call for illegal immigrants to be placed in forced labour camps where they will be used as slave labour to build a giant wall separating the USA and Mexico.

Fortunately, other Republicans are rebuking this maniac. But it’s gotta make you wonder about that party, no?

What? It doesn’t? How about this, then? You know how BushCo is trying to access citizens’ phone records in the name of counter-terrorism? Well, it now seems that they were trying to do this before 9/11!

And while we’re on the topic of hypocrisy, I think it’s useful to always keep this photo handy:

This weekend I had the great pleasure of seeing my cousin/niece Ashley, who is now 7 years old. (Ashley is the one who drew this remarkably accurate picture of me 5 years ago.)

Anyway, the little angel impressed me once again when she said to me –in perfect fluent French!– “You look like a boy. But I’m not sure that you are a boy, because you have a fat ass.”

In other news, I saw Superman Returns on the weekend. I really, really enjoyed this film. It’s got plot holes big enough to fly my fat ass through, but the themes of family, loss, romance, reconnection and messiah-ness more than made up for it. I actually found it emotionally moving at times, which is something science-fiction films (and novels) often do for me. So, because I’m a big fat-assed sissy geek, I’m going to list for you some of the saddest or most moving moments in science-fiction TV and movie history:

  • The final episode of Babylon 5, a real tear-jerker for those who followed the show
  • That episode of Star Trek in which Kirk loses his memory and marries an Indian girl
  • The final episode of Quantum Leap, in which Sam discovers he can never stop leaping
  • The Abyss, particularly the scene in which we all think the chick is dead
  • In The Six Million Dollar Man / Bionic Woman when Steve Austin hides from Jaimie the spot on the tree where their names and a heart had been bionically carved into the bark
  • That Star Trek: TNG episode where Picard gets all family and shit
  • The final episode of Angel, particularly the scene where Wesley is dying, and the thing that used to be Fred pretends to be Fred one last time

What am I missing?